I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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