ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
