it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
