Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I intend to get homeless drunk
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
