Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
