I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
