you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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