I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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