My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
