i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
