theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
operation harelip BJ is a go
I intend to get homeless drunk
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
