living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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