I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
