I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize
