Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
