After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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