i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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