i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least life still wants to fuck me.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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