How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
foreskin is a definite game changer
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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