on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
