grandma shit on top of the toilet
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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