Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
