I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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