And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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