Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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