sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I checked into jail on foursquare
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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