How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
My apartment stinks of burning failure
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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