so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
