Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Randomize
