i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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