just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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