she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
