with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I am available for nakedness
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
