Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
