Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
