Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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