In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
