also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
