Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
