Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
