it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize
