What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
