Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed

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  (212): Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed http://tfl.nu/7dug
  Replies (4) Good night (1158) Bad night (1414)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.

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  (803): I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide. http://tfl.nu/8cjy
  Replies (8) Good night (727) Bad night (1192)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother

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  (561): As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother http://tfl.nu/1acl
  Replies (21) Good night (2282) Bad night (613)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.

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  (770): Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces. http://tfl.nu/5t2e
  Replies (11) Good night (3649) Bad night (984)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.

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  (414): and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you. http://tfl.nu/lmfo
  Replies (27) Good night (6471) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.

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  (512): I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub. http://tfl.nu/cojk
  Replies (7) Good night (6200) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.

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  (937): A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining. http://tfl.nu/4mc3
  Replies (16) Good night (2761) Bad night (920)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution

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  (713): It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution http://tfl.nu/g3ws
  Replies (8) Good night (907) Bad night (808)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.

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  (206): Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear. http://tfl.nu/poja
  Replies (9) Good night (1364) Bad night (564)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here

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  (614): We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here http://tfl.nu/ha0m
  Replies (6) Good night (1423) Bad night (543)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.

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  (937): think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside. http://tfl.nu/fjz3
  Replies (3) Good night (414) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"

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  (785): He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him. (785): Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!" http://tfl.nu/v4v8
  Replies (4) Good night (1079) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.

  (323): View more from California

  Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in

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  (323): The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god. (323): Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in http://tfl.nu/1gsf
  Replies (4) Good night (981) Bad night (367)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.

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  (423): I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free. http://tfl.nu/3xxx
  Replies (1) Good night (868) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.

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  (603): seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed. http://tfl.nu/l8pu
  Replies (6) Good night (282) Bad night (456)

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