Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(323): View more from California

i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.

(818): View more from California

she hot?

(323): View more from California

i don't wanna talk about it

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(323): i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car. (818): she hot? (323): i don't wanna talk about it http://tfl.nu/ojc9

Replies (6) Good night (751) Bad night (1590)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.

(1-401): View more from Rhode Island

i dont think thats weird i think thats fun

(401): View more from Rhode Island

i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird

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(401): he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places. (1-401): i dont think thats weird i think thats fun (401): i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird http://tfl.nu/88jj

Replies (11) Good night (682) Bad night (2106)
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(646): View more from New York

Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?

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(646): Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself? http://tfl.nu/aacm

Replies (5) Good night (729) Bad night (4729)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.

(307): View more from Wyoming

Haha. Niice.

(479): View more from Arkansas

Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.

(307): View more from Wyoming

both.

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(479): So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack. (307): Haha. Niice. (479): Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered. (307): both. http://tfl.nu/wvm3

Replies (46) Good night (5981) Bad night (870)
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(586): View more from Michigan

he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...

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(586): he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement... http://tfl.nu/jgil

Replies (13) Good night (883) Bad night (5099)
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(607): View more from New York

do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand

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(607): do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand http://tfl.nu/6yen

Replies (21) Good night (3533) Bad night (1074)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem

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(847): I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem http://tfl.nu/9xlk

Replies (16) Good night (5322) Bad night (1050)
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(513): View more from Ohio

With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap

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(513): With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap http://tfl.nu/39t2

Replies (7) Good night (2513) Bad night (740)
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(+61): View more from Australia

She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.

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(+61): She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING. http://tfl.nu/6o0j

Replies (17) Good night (1059) Bad night (2011)
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(707): View more from California

I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.

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(707): I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any. http://tfl.nu/bt78

Replies (17) Good night (684) Bad night (2039)
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(530): View more from California

red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.

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(530): red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song. http://tfl.nu/0nv8

Replies (10) Good night (2081) Bad night (589)
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(480): View more from Arizona

You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it

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(480): You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it http://tfl.nu/17sa

Replies (3) Good night (787) Bad night (326)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.

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(508): I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress. http://tfl.nu/zrup

Replies (1) Good night (706) Bad night (383)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled

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(910): I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled http://tfl.nu/mvb6

Replies (8) Good night (524) Bad night (1041)
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(417): View more from Missouri

Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead

(1-417): View more from Missouri

Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.

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(417): Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead (1-417): Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp. http://tfl.nu/xy3p

Replies (7) Good night (653) Bad night (244)

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