I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
The power of my boobs compel you
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
