we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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