I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Dating After Heartbreak
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...