I seem to have left my pride at pride
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
