Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
