Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
