My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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