he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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