I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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